Up up and away I go...
What makes me saddest is the fact that I will not return home for about one and a half years. Mum has said that I cannot return to visit till 2015, and it's understandable seeing the rising costs of living cancel out unnecessary needs such as a plane ticket home every year. I'm excited though, and dream of spending summer vacations visiting the bunch of friends that I've promised to visit in the US, and I do so want to explore the many beauties that America has. I cannot wait to witness for myself national parks and waterfalls, amusement parks, landmarks, monuments... America. You are intriguing.
Yet, inside, I've still vowed to be my same Malaysian self. How can I never miss the same wooden double decker bed I've slept in for more than a decade, the same old room and creaky broken cupboard that held my clothes, the floral faded curtains that are torn and yet, still serviceable? How will I not miss ordering food at all the usual chinese restaurants, enjoying mamak fare, going out for a good dinner on Sundays with my family? How will I not miss the family gatherings at my grandpa's house, the dusty, rusty, ancient house that my mother grew up in and its tiny field where my cousin and I used to catch butterflies? How will I not miss the sights of Klang, the everyday familiar sights of Subang Jaya, the shopping malls? Sunway Pyramid, Empire, Citta Mall... and oh, how I will miss Subang Parade. It is like my second home. I will miss SS15, the horrific jams, the many restaurants I tried there, Taylor's College campus. I will miss SS19, my lovely neighborhood, where I once went for runs every evening, where I cycled every evening as a child with my sister and mother, and then with friends. I will miss knowing all the routes and shortcuts that connect to this alley, and to that road. I will miss all the nooks and crannies, I will miss the playground where we once fooled about. I will miss my house, my lawn, the swing, the old black creaky gate that has never changed since my parents bought the house. I will miss my car, the Christmas tree where I park it, and the other tree with its giant protruding root.
I will miss home. Very, very much.
I thought I would have plenty of time to mull over my impending departure, but now there seems no time at all to stop and take in all the memories I want to stuff and keep forever. How will Joel look like in two years? How will he have changed? Will he be lonely?
I'm also currently luxuriating in the fact I have a lovely room all to myself, along with a nice bathroom, with AC and fans and having the freedom to throw everything as I like. Argh, I am not looking forward to a room with no ceiling fans, no AC, common bathroom, and having a stranger as a roommate. Time to grow up, Esther, it seems.
During these last two weeks I will do everything I can to preserve my memory of home. I've made a little list, just to help me along:
1. Go cycling around neighborhood
2. Visit Pyramid, Citta Mall, Empire and Subang Parade(of course) one last time
3. Play my piano as much as possible
4. Enjoy my short-term privacy
5. Visit playground-- SWING!
6. Eat Klang popiah one last time
7. Pan Mee!
8. Fried rice, fried mee, fried kuey teow...
9. Visit BigHug Burger again. I must eat their burgers one last time, it's too good.
10. One final Younified meeting, and church, of course.
11. Take photos with everyone.
12. Hug Kia as much as possible.
13. Take lots of photos with Kia!
14. Pack as much memories as possible.
15. Get the frozen gelato I miss.
16. Go back to Baci?
17. Eat ALL of mum's cooking!
18. To be continued...
Not very necessary things, I believe, but it's almost all a must.
Home. I will miss you desperately.
Already getting homesick, while I'm still home! This is silly. But no matter.
It's time to power up.
Hawai'i is waiting.
But I will never, ever, forget where I come from. This, for me, is home. First home. Always.
No comments:
Post a Comment